Thursday, June 14, 2012

Unconditional Respect?

Being the daughter of and working for the man who wrote a book on marriage titled, “Love and Respect,” has made it impossible to ignore the word ‘respect’ and what it means to me.  I will admit, Ephesians 5:33 is not a passage many of us women jump for joy when reading.
by Candace Cameron Bure
“However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” 
Ephesians 5:33
Even though the thought of respecting a husband can understandably be met with resistance, I think my perspective shifted and things finally clicked when I looked at the research.
We asked over 7,000 people if in conflict they feel more unloved or disrespected?
83% of men said they felt more disrespected.
72% of women said they felt more unloved. 
Thats huge.
Setting aside evil people and simply looking at those like you and me who are flawed but good willed, then it’s significant that there is such a drastic percentage of people who feel a particular way IN conflict. Proving my fathers phrase, “Not wrong, just different.”
(Unless we believe men are wrong for feeling the way they say they are feeling. But we would never do that!)
It finally clicked for me. Maybe God is giving us instructions on how to deal with each other in conflict because he wants us to be at peace!

I know I want both love and respect, so how are they different?
Well, first of all I have come to believe that men and women are different. Research on the male and female brain gives me confidence in this arena.
Plus most diagrams in the doctors office.
What frustrates me is that people sometimes assume when we say someone is different; we are stating that they are lesser in value.


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